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Goldenseal and Drug Testing

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Need to pass a drug test?

 

Because of the widespread use of Goldenseal to try to mask the results of drug testing, and because the supply of this plant in the wild is dwindling fast for this very reason, I thought it would be appropriate to insert a page here about drug testing and what really does and doesn't work.  Make no mistake about it, Goldenseal does not work for masking drug testing results.  People who have reported successes with it probably didn't have much of whatever drug they were doing in their system, and the reason for passing the test was probably due to the huge amounts of water they ingested while taking the product.

Drug testing today is really just glorified Marijuana testing. Marijuana stays in the system much longer than other drugs, such as Cocaine, and thus a person who took Marijuana a few weeks ago will more likely test positive for drugs than a person who took cocaine two days ago. The ways people use to try to beat the test are as varied as the individuals themselves, and the testing facilities have gotten wise to many of the tactics, making it very difficult to skew the results. Don't even think about trying Goldenseal, because almost all facilities test for it and fail you on the spot if they find it. 

Having said that, there are basically three things you can do when faced with an impending drug test.  The first is to somehow quickly detoxify, which is fairly difficult with Marijuana usage, because THC is stored in fat cells and is present for a long time after the fact (30-90 days).  The second is to substitute someone else's urine, which is possible only if you are not supervised during the peeing stage.  There are issues with this tactic, as the urine has to be just the right temperature, and you may not know everything about the person submitting the sample. There's a story circulating around about a man who used his wife's urine for his drug test.  When the results came in, there was good news and bad news.  The good news was that he passed the drug test.  The bad news was that he was pregnant.  The third tactic is to put something in the urine to mask the evidence of drug use.  This one is the one to use in an emergency situation, but beware - the testing facility is looking for just this type of thing and you may not get away with it.

Depending on how much warning you have, you can greatly minimize the amount of THC in your body, very possibly below the threshold tested for, by doing the two week regimen I am about to describe.  Because THC is stored in fat cells, the object is to burn off some of those fat cells and dilute the ones left with other substances.  You will need at least two weeks before your drug test to make this work, but if you have the time, it will very probably work for you.  The first week, get out there and exercise vigorously.  Play tennis or jog, or do whatever it is you need to do to get that heart rate up and burn off fat cells.  Don't let up, and do it every day for the entire week.  During this time, drink lots of water - 8 big glasses or more per day. The second week is more fun.  Eat as much as you can - stuff at every meal, and continue drinking as much water as you can stand.  By the time of the test, the combination of burning the fat cells and diluting them with the overstuffing in the second week should have reduced THC levels enough to get you through the test without failing.  To be sure, invest in a quick test for THC like the one to the left above to see how you stand before the test.

When you don't have this kind of time, you are stuck with the choice of adding something to your urine or using someone else's.  There are products that are commercially available, including powdered urine with pocket heaters that will deliver a sample at exactly the correct temperature, and additives that you can add that claim to guarantee results.  I would be interested in hearing how these products really work, but if it was my job on the line and I knew I was going to test positive, I would certainly consider trying one of them. 

Lastly, never give your first urine of the day, as it is the most potent, and be sure to stop drinking water so heavily the day before the test so that your urine will not seem watered down - which is a big red flag for the testing facility.  Also, consider taking a Vitamin B capsule to bring back the amber color of the urine after all this flushing so that the color won't tip them off to something amiss.

 

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